In my feelins...

*Disclaimer: This is a READ, but it's worth it! Also, while reading this, listen to this, if you don't mind a lil rap music, you should play this song in the background: Click here

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I'm just going to honestly say here that I be in my damn feelings! Whew! Ok! Now that we have that out the way, I just want to say how I really dislike the saying "get out yo feelins" "why you in yo feelins" anything to that nature, I DO NOT like! And my first sentence may tell you why! It's honestly not like I want to be emotionally heavy on the surfice *that's how I put it when I wrote in my journal* but it just works out that way. I try to conceal how I actually feel most of the time, but sometimes, with certain people and certain situations, I can't hide them AT ALL! I give it away by the expression(s) on my face, the tone of my voice, my whole body language may even change. I just hadn't mastered how to hide it! Praying on this though. But! Because I don't like this quote, I wanted to get other people's take on this! I made a few Snaps and asked some people a few questions about the phrase and the things that surround it. For the people that wanted to be anonymous, I granted their wishes, which was most, lol, but just know these are SURELY responses I recieved from others. Continue reading below...

So as I was scrolling through the feed, I saw this post that seemed to fit in to an answer for the question I posed. The post read: "We all go through shit, battles, struggles and etc. the real keep it to ourselves like you 'posed to. don't wear that shit on yo shirt hold it in till it's figured out" (Guy 1)

So, I decided to dig deeper with him first. (Guy 1)

Q: Do you consider "being in your feelings" bad, or something that can be healthy?

A: Bad - depending on what you're in your feelings about and how you are in your feelings

Q: What did you mean when you said "how you are in your feelings"?

A: Like whining and crying and complaining, or studying the situaation. Crying and complaining won't solve anything, but thinking about and contemplating on it for a little while to get a conclusion is ok, to give yourself closure. No matter what you tell yourself, because you're always right in your own mind. But it just depends on what you're in your feelings about.

Q: How do you feel about your girl/significant other being in their feelings

A: I hate it. I dislike it. Only certain aspects of it tells you certain things. But if you know your gf and be around her you'll know if it's about something she shouldn't be in her feelings about then that's bad. If it's something someone did then ok, but if it's something you made up in your head then that's different you shouldn't let that get to you like that.

Q: When your girl/ significant other is in her feelings, what do you do?

A: Ignore it & keep goin. Just get outta the way. Give her time to figure it out because mostly she doesn't know what she's talking about. If i say anything it'll seem like I'm trying to flip it so I don't usually say anything, to avoid making it seem like it's something else. I'll sit there and listen, but not reply a lot. Most of the time she's thinking too hard.

Q:How do you get to a common grounds with a female in her feelings?

A: Ain't no understandin a woman fr, she's always right

(Darius)

"It's a reliever of whats locked way in your mind and heart"

Q: Do you consider "being in your feelings" bad, or something that can be healthy?

A: In my opinion, I think being in your feelings is good simply because it is a release of what's locked away in your mind and heart ...it symbolizes honesty and you taking a stand for who you are

Q:How do you handle it when your GF/significant other is "in their feelins"

A: I normally address it because you never know what a person have on their mind and she's always looking for some type of peace and motivation to uplift her spirit

(Guy 3)

"...give me some time to miss them and wanna go back"

Q: How do you handle it when your GF/significant other is "in their feelings"?

A: I let her have it. Sometimes the girl can be stubborn. I really don't pay it attention. Can't be asking no "what's wrong, what's wrong". I know some girls do like it when you get all under them and ask that, but I just let it be. I let it cool down first. Because then I might get hot. Leave the situation, give me some time to miss them and wanna go back.

Q: How does the situation usually end?

A: I try to come to a common grounds. Like after I get high, I can just lay on her lap and talk about it. Just try to get it over with so we can move on.

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AFTER ALL OF THAT!

While it appears for the most part that being "in your feelings" appears to be looked at as a sign of weakness, I truly believe it is something good to do. It allows you to be honest with yourself (& with others) when it comes to your feelings. Should you constantly harp on the things that make you feel sad or frustrated? NOT AT ALL. However, acknowledging the feelings and figuring how to handle them, is admired. It takes a great strength to control your feelings/ emotions. But, it is something worth taking the time to master. While I'm not there yet, I'm going to figure out how to. I am truly working on how to just let certain sh!t go! If I can't change it, I'm not going to waste my energy on it. My hope is that if you can relate, that you find the ability to do that also. One way I am starting to do this is by recognizing the more positive things that are surrounding me on my day to day. This allows my head to be in a more positive space where I can be more peaceful. And when a situation comes, I will have trained my mind to think more positive in order to process the situation without throwing off my energy. Will it be like this all the time? No! But practice makes perfect. I have attached some links below of sites that give tips on how to be in control of emotions. Check them out and let me know what you think!

LINKS

1) How to stop being a slave to your emotions : This one I like a lot. It kind of answers my question about the whole acknowledging your feelings are ignore them thing...

2) How to control your emotions effectively : This site has some great content on it. Some things on here hit home withe me.

CONTACT

Click here to let me know what you think about this post and about the articles!

*i really love the fact that you can feel me bae...* if you played the song you get that shit... lol

Honestly,

MARY